Disappointment

I’d like to have continued my denial for another week or more, but last night my wife Sarah decided that she needed me to “fuck me hard and fill my cunt with cum.” in her words.

While it may seem strange to some that I would like to have been denied my wifes pussy at all; the ideas and thoughts I’ve had over the last week or so and the fact my wife has only allowed me to cum outside of her cunt has really excited me. I’ve also had in my mind that she has a ‘boyfriend’ call Simon (she doesn’t, but the idea came from a dream I had about her with someone else).

I now really quite enjoy being denied my own wifes cunt (certainly for my pleasure). But if Sarah wants my cock inside her for her pleasure that that’s a turn on for me.

I suppose she did want my cock inside her (and my cum) last night and she clearly really did enjoy me “fucking her hard”. Unfortunately I enjoyed cumming in her cunt as well, but would like to have been told that it was forbidden, I would have enjoyed that for much longer after (while at the time it would have been frustrating).

So last night once we’d gone through the vanilla sex (though she did say ‘no kissing tonight’ of me masterbating her clit, which I enjoy (because she likes it) and in my mind I’m thinking.

There she is the bitch, making me wank her clit with my untouched rock hard cock next to her. She might let me have a little pleasure soon (if I’m good). She won’t even let me kiss her tonight. She just wants me to pleasure her and is not even interested in who it is that’s wanking her clit, I bet she lets Simon do this to her and kisses him all the time.

Periodically she’d grab my hand and push my fingers right up her cunt, then bring them back out to focus on her clit. Every now and then, she’d grab my cock and pull on it and let out a little moan. So back in my mind I’m thinking.

She’s wet tonight, I bet she’s been to see ‘Simon’ her boyfriend. I should think she want him to cum insider her all the time with his potent cum and his small cock. I bet she likes his small cock because it’s not as unfomfortable as mind (she has said mind is too big from time to time, which as you can imagine is very nice for me). All she’s let me do this last week is wank or be wanked.

Then she had an orgasm, I lifted her up on to me (she was facing away from my face and I was on my back). She knew what to do, she straddled me facing towards my feet, grabbed my cock and stuffed it in to her gaping wet hole. I know after an orgasm from wanking her clit she loves to be filled with cock.

So there she was (still not kissing me, facing away from me, It could have been anyones cock inside her, as long as it was up her cunt she wouldn’t have cared) gyrating and making the most of the warm feeling of having had an orgasm.

I was thinking:

So I’m just a dildo to her, wank her clit for her and then she uses my cock like a dildo just for her pleasure. She enjoys full sex with Simon her boyfriend, but just uses me like a sex toy. I’m not allowed to cum insider her all week, then I’m only allowed to cum twice in the week (in her presence), sometime I have to wank in front of her only to be denied an ejaculation. Now, once again she’s just using my cock like a dildo to pleasure herself.

But then I waas told “fuck me hard and fill my cunt with cum.” which did not really fit my little fantasy, so I thought.

So Simon (the boyfriend) must have failed to deliver earlier, I’ll show you want a real fucking is then you slut. You cuckold me with Simon, then your boyfriend can’t come up with the goods (with his small dick) and you’re back to me. You’re going to get the full length and girth of my cock stuck you tonight. I’m going to make your cunt sore, so you’ll deny me for at least a month you bitch.

I rolled her over on to her front, pulled her up so she was on her hands and knees (still with my cock up her) then reached round and roughly grasped and kneeded her tits. She started moaning.

Then I pushed her head down and her arms gave way, I grabbed her right arm and pulled it behind her, then with my left arm I pushed down on her left shoulder and thrusted hard up her cunt. She let out a yelp (Ahhh).

I thought yes, you fucking little whore you can moan, but you’ve asked for this, your boyfriend has failed to deliver and now you’ve got to pay the price of me fucking you hard (very hard).

I started to pound away at her, all the time she was struggling and moaning, her head thrashing to and fro, I could seen she was cloase to another orgasm and just ploughed on fucking her harder and harder. I could hear slopping sounds as my engorged swollen cock thrusted ever deeper into her cunt. She tried to close her legs to ‘throttle’ the length of my cock back, as every time I thrusted I could feel the tip of my cock ‘topping out insider her’. I pushed her legs apart again, so I could get the whole of my cock right up her.

“Oh god” she said “I can’t take anymore, please cum inside me now I’ve had enough”.

I wasn’t gong to let my slut wife off that easily, I wanted to be sure she’d be keener on denying me for a month or more, so I carried on. I pulled her other arm behind her back and held both her hands in the small of her back with my left hand.

Then I thrusted and pounded her cunt some more, finally after a couple more minutes I was ready to cum. I could feel it building up and started thrusting harder and deeper (Sarah moaning all the time and starting to struggle), I pinned her down and then with my right hand gasped her right buttock, my thumb carefully pressing against her arse hole.

At some point during this she had another orgasm, but I was too busy to notice (or care, she’d been given enough pleasure, now it was my turn).

I was really to cum inside the fucking bitch, I pushed down with my thumb and her arse hole yielded and in it went upto the first knuckle on my thumb. Once again she yelped “Oh no, I can’t take that as well, cum now, please cum now”.

I could feel my thumb in her arse through my cock and almost immediately came, thrusting and pounding her now very wet but sore cunt. I ejaculated up Sarahs swollen and well pounded pussy.

I withdrew my cock (and thumb from her arse) and rolled off to catch my breath.

“What possessed you tonight” she said.

“You said you wanted it hard” I responded.

“Well that was about as hard as I can take it, I won’t need fucking for a while now” Sarah said.

Good I thought, you can work me up and deny me for a month then, I’d enjoy that. Your boyfriend with his small dick can give you all the vanilla sex you want. I either want to fuck you hard like a slut/whore, or be denied your pussy and only be allowed to wank (or be wanked/sucked off).

“Didn’t you enjoy that?” I asked.

“Well, eer, yes I did, but I wouldn’t want hard sex like that all the time.” Sarah responded.

“OK, perhaps we should stick with wanking for a while then” I suggested.

“What’s the matter with you at them moment, do you enjoy wanking as much as full sex” Sarah said.

“Sometimes I do, but I do enjoy full sex as well, wanking and sucking is just different, but not more or less enjoyable. But I do like being worked up and teased and left with a hard cock from time to time.” I admitted.

“OK, now you’ve made me this sore, from that really quite violent fucking, my cunt is off limits for a while. What do you say to that?”

“I’m already turned on by what you’ve just said” I retorted.

“Mmmmm, sex is changing between us and becoming more varied, isn’t is”.

So that’s how we left it, maybe I’ll be denied a little more from now on. But at least it’s not just vanilla. Not sure I want to go for the full BDSM or cuckolding life style. In fact with my mind I’m not sure I need to.

Like horror films one’s imagination seems way more powerful than some flawed reality, in my mind everything fits together, Simon is perfect (or just what I want him to be, when I want him to be that way) not sure reality would be quite so flexible or under my control.

It just gets better

This morning Sarah, grabbed my cock, worked me up until I was hard and rolled over and pushed my cock up her cunt from behind.

Not a word was spoken.

Then she said “No cumming, I don’t want an orgasm, just to feel your hard dick inside me.”

After a couple of minutes, I started to thrust a little.

“That’s enough now. Go and make me some tea.” she said.

I withdrew, kissed her on her cheek and said ok.

When I brought her tea up to her she said “And no wanking, I like your cock hard like it was the other night, working you up and not letting you cum seems to make it harder. I’ll know if you’ve wanked yourself off. I’ll decide when you need to cum, and you won’t be cumming up my cunt for a while either. Do you like that idea?”

I responded quietly “Yes, I admit my cock does get harder when I’ve been worked up and denied an ejaculation and I love the feeling of getting very hard, so I think you’re right, you decide when I get to cum.”

So again I’d been denied (nice, chubby cock all day).

She’s driving me wild at present, and I love it.

What a night

Last night was the best yet, got into bed with Sarah at about 10:30. She went to take her top off and put on a white cotton tee shrt for the night and I pounced.

“Leave that off” I said, leaning over and rubbing her right breast. She turned to face me and kissed me hard, then biting my lower lip.

“I bet your cock’s hard already isn’t it” she said quietly. She then reached down and sure enough it was. We spent a few minutes fondling and kissing each other. I carefully pulled her white cotton panties down.

I started to move down to lick her cunt and she said “No not tonight, I just want your big hard cock in there”.

I moved to get on top of her, she spread her legs, grabbed my really swollen cock. “You’re big tonight, this might me a struggle”. she said and started pushing it into her cunt.

It was quite a struggle, maybe it’s the lack of her having sex for a week or so, or me being rock hard and swollen, but when I pushed I felt real resistance in her cunt. She arched her back and eventually it went in all the way. Bare in mind Sarah has had three kids, my cock is about 7.5″ long and 5.5″ around, so not that big but slightly larger than normal.

She orgasmed almost immediatly (something she never does normally), then I started to push and fuck her normally (missionary). I could see she wasn’t comfortable, so asked if everything was alright.

“You’re too big and hard” she said (now that’s what I call a compliment). “You’re pushing up against my cervix.”

“Pull my cock back a bit until it’s comfortable for you then” I suggested.

Which she did, grabbing my dick at the base and using it on her self like a dildo. She was also rubbing her clit with her thumb. Within a minute or so she’d had her second explosive orgasm.

I lay on top of her for a while, kissing her and enjoying the feeling of her cunt gripping an releasing my cock (while it was still hard), thinking how nice it had been.

“I’ll wank you off, now” she said “I want to see how much cum you have, you’re not going to be cumming inside me tonight, —, does that excite you?”

“Yes” I said “it does excite me, being denied cumming inside you and you wanking me off”.

“Get up on your hands and knees, put one knee up against my cunt and I’ll wank you off all over my tits.”

I put one knee one side of her right leg and one knee on the inside, I could feel her wet open cunt rubbing up against it. Then she grabbed my cock with her right hand and and started wanking me off.

In my mind I was thinking

it’s been more than a week since I was allowed to fuck my wife and cum inside her. She’s teased me and played with my cock and then denied even to be allowed to cum at all.

After that she’d been given a nice orgasm and wanted to watch me wanking my dick only to stop me cumming again. Now finally she’d let me penetrate her to give her an orgasm, but once again she’d denied me cumming inside her again.

Now I have had a vasectomy, so to tease myself I decided that she didn’t want me cumming inside her was because my cum contained no sperm and was therefore no use to her. Now this really excited me, my wife did not want my useless cum insider her, she really wanted another mans potent cum to impregnate her (she has talked of this in the past in a light hearted way).

Within a couple of minutes I shot my load all over her. With her left hand she rubbed the cum all over her tits and said she coudn’t beleive how much was coming out.

I really wanted to lick the cum up, but thought that might me pushing it a bit.

We cleaned up and she went to have a bath, I had a shower, then we had a chat. I said how much I enjoyed sex with her.

She said “You didn’t mind still not cumming inside me did you?”

“No, I don’t mind, in fact I like being denied certain things every now and then.” I responded.

“Really, I’m surprised, I thought you’d be annoyed, but it was what I wanted to do with you.”

“Please, do what you want with me, if I want something else I’ll ask.” I said.

“Don’t ask, just take what you want when you want it and I’ll submit. But if you like me to deny certain things I will every now and then. But I do want you to take me sometimes and make me have what you want.”

And on that note we went to sleep.

No follow up

Well, I got my desire. Still no proper sex.

I asked her if she was in the mood, she said “Not for you to cum inside me no, but you can wank my clit for me.”

This was better than I’d hoped for, I was still being denied, even after the licking and sucking of my cock she gave me earlier in the week. She still wasn’t going to let me cum.

So I teased and fondled her nipples, worked my way down to her cunt and gently teased her clit with my fingers.

“Don’t put your fingers in my cunt.” I was told in quite a strict and forceful way, “Just my clit, it’s been aching after I sucked your cock earlier in the week, I need relief.”.

I continued to masterbate my wife, she was concentrating and moaning. Periodically I’d touch her nipple and then lick and suck it, then she pushed my head away from her tits.

“No I don’t want that, just my clit, concentrate on my clit, I want to cum hard, you’re distracting me.”

She’s not been like this before, so direct and selfish (I got the feeling of being used and I like it (esp thedenial of tits and inside her cunt).

Every now and then she’d reach down with her hand and grab my rock hard cock and pull it about, she was quite rough sometimes.

Then after about 5-6 minutes of me wanking her clit, she came, writhing about and pulling on my cock even harder.

“Wank your dick, I want to see you wank now.” I was disappointed, I really wanted to be fully denied (little was I to know).

I lay back and started wanking for my wife to watch, all the time her hand was rubbing her clit and occasionally pushing a finger inside her own cunt (something she’d just denied me). I started to tense up and could feel I would be shooting my load very shortly.

“That’s it” she said and leaned over grabbed my hand (to stop me wanking) “I’ve seen enough now, I’ve had a nice orgasm, now you can stroke my back and bum. I might let you cum in me tomorrow night. I’d like that”.

So that was that, I got to within inches of cumming only to be denied. So it turned out even better than I could have hoped.

I stroked her back and bum, my cock still hard and balls aching. Every now and then she’d reach behind her and play with my hard cock.

Finally she said “Was it good for you, do you like sex this way?”

I responded in a quite voice “Yes, I really enjoy sex this way, I’ll enjoy this all tonight and tomorrow, just thinking about what you’ve done to me. But I do need to cum soon, please let me fuck you properly tomorrow.”

What a night..

Little treat

Woke up this morning and Sarah put her feet over my side of the bed to rub up and down my cock.

Then she said “oh dear, thought it might be hard, that’s no good to me”. I moved over to stoke her and her white cotton top was already pushed up over her tits. I stroked and fondled them.

“You can’t suck them, don’t get them wet” I was told.

Within a minute or so my cock was hard. She rolled over to face away from me, “stick it between my legs” she said. She still had her white cotton panties on, I did as I was told.

“That’s what I like” she said “your cock to be nice and hard for me. But don’t get your hopes up, you won’t be cumming this morning. I just want to feel it when it’s hard.”

Now for some people this would be a frustration, but for me, this is what I’m looking for. Anything sexual that is none straight forward and not vanilla. OK this might not be the most sexually explicit or perverted thing in the world, but for me I got to think about sex all day because of this.

Then she rolled back to face me and kissed me, then her head moved down my body. She grabbed my cock with her hand and and kissed the end. Then licked up and down the shaft and took the whole end into her mouth. She sucked it gently (and sleepily) with her head on my belly. “I’m still half asleep” she said.

I pushed my hips forward to get more of my cock into her mouth.

“No more, I just want to lick your cock a bit, but you can’t cum, you’ll have to wait until later. I might me in the mood for sex with you later”.

God this was great, being teased, maybe I’ll get sex maybe not. Part of me hopes not, then she’ll have got me hard, denied me her tits, given my cock a lick, suck and teased it, not allowed me to cum, and then to cap it off denied me sex later.

She gave my cock one last suck and then came up to kiss my mouth. Her mouth was hot and tasted of my cock a little. She kissed me with her mouth open, licking my lips and puting her tongue gently into my mouth.

“Now go and make me some tea”. She said.

I aways make her tea in the morning and do the kids food.

So my hard cock was left unwanked, my balls full of cum. I had nothing but sex (with my wife) on my mind all day.

So tonight maybe the teasing will continue, I really hope it does, I’ve had a semi hard-on all day.

Told to wank

Sarah woke this morning and wanted ’stroking all over’ Kids still asleep. So I stroked legs, back, belly.

“No all over like this” she said grabbing my hand and rubbing it all over her tits and then down to her white cotton pantie covered (barely) cunt. I continued ’stroking’ sometimes pushing down under her panties.

I then complained that I was ‘hard’, she said let me feel. “Oh you are hard aren’t you, I’d like to feel that inside me. But only feel it I don’t want full sex.”

This was music to my ears, I was to be allowed to put my cock in my wifes cunt for her enjoyment, but not be allowed to fuck her properly.

She rolled over on her side and grabbed by cock from behind her and pushed it into her cunt. I was hard and so had little trouble pushing in even though she was not very wet.

“MMM that feels nice, push it in a little further, yes that’s it right up. Now play with my clit with your fingers”. Which I did, all the time wanting to fuck properly my cock throbbing ever harder.

After a couple of minutes.

“That’s enough now, I want to watch you wank yourself off now.”

For me it doesn’t get much better than this. I’ve had my cock used to lightly pleasure my wife and been denied proper sex, now I have to wank myself off while my wife watches.

I slide my cock out and started wanking, Sarah on my left then whispered in my ear. “Come on wank yourself off I want to see your cum all over your belly.”

With that I ejaculated.

Maybe she’ll want a proper fuck tonight, or maybe I’ll have to wank myself off for her again!

Going through the motions

Well we did have sex last night, but talk about going through the motions.
Got to bed, had a little frot, then she went to the loo for a pee. Came back and just grabbed by cock (not really fully erect yet) and pushed it up her (still quite dry) cunt. After a couple of pushes and pulls (and me getting a little more erect) I was in.
the she pulled me on top and I did the business, she had an orgasm in short order (couple of minutes). I was left feeling ‘like what do I do now’.

I asked her what else she wanted “nothing I’m finished now, do what you want”. So I rolled her over and fucked her from behind in my mind thinking (right you fucked like a whore trying to get through as many clients in a night, I’ll fuck you like one). So I drove my cock hard up against her right up to the hilt, fast and pounding (thinking I probably won’t get a another fuck this week so I’m going to screw you hard you fucking bitch).

I could hear her moaning (not like she was cumming, but like I’ve had enough now). I kept going and going and then finally gave a big push and came up the sluts cunt.

I then rolled off and she went to cleanup. (Good I thought, just like a real whore, get ready for your next client).

So no real connection with her last night, she just went through the motions (so did I).

Wanked

Well last night was a slightly different experience. Saturday morning I did all the washing and ironing (I do normally do this on a Saturday as Sarah goes into town to meet some friends). In my mind this sometimes turns into a fantasy of her having sex with someone else while I do the chores (pretty standard cuckold type fantasy).

Saturday night we just went to sleep, neither of us particularly in the mood. Sunday morning woke with the horn, had it rubbed a little, but then had to get up and sort the kids out. Morning sex is a pretty rushed affair and Sarah is not keen on sex in the morning. I like having the horn and slight frot and then being denied (I have to admit).

Sunday night, Sarah went up to bed about 10:30PM and I followed soon after. Went to kiss her and continues kissing her (she wasn’t too responsive). We then had the following encounter:

“Aren’t you interested tonight?”

“Maybe, hadn’t really thought about it”

I kissed her some more and rubbed my now hardening dick up her leg.

“I can see you’re interested”.

“Should I have just gone to the bathroom and wanked myself off and left you to sleep?”

“Wank yourself off here next to me now.”

I started to stroke my cock and wank it gently, she pull back the covers to watch and rub her cunt up and down my leg. She started moaning slightly and I kissed her a little more. The I pushed up her white cotton top (she still had her standard white cotton panties on) and fondled her nipple. The I bend forward to lick and suck her right nipple. She pushed me back and pulled down her white cotton top.

“Don’t you want me to do that tonight.”

“No, you wank your cock, you can’t have my tits or cunt tonight.”

God I almost came right there and then, my mind quickly replayed a little fantasy in the context of this encounter.

She’d gone into town on Saturday, but on the way had met a female acquaintance from the local council estate (our kids know each other). This women is a bit rough and her husband is rougher. This women invites Sarah back to her house where Sarah encounters the husband who takes a liking to my wife. Sarahs female acquaintance then says her husband likes her and suggests they all go to bed. Sarah then starts kissing the rough husband and his wife starts saying “Fuck her, I want to watch you fuck the posh little bitch” (Sarah can be a bit stuck up at times). “Go on suck his cock”. He takes out cock and pushes Sarahs head down, she willingly sucks his dick, then he spins her around, bends her over and sticks his cock hard into her cunt, reaches around and start pulling hard on her tits and pinches her nipples. “That’s it” the wife starts shouting “fuck her hard, make her have it, harder, harder.” The wife then comes over, pulls Sarahs head up, grabs one of her nipples, starts twisting it and says “he’s good at fucking isn’t he?” All the time Sarah is panting, moaning and having orgasm after orgasm, her cunt being pounded by this rough guy with his large cock. She replies to the wife “Yes, I’ve never been fucked to hard or cum so much, thankyou, thankyou for letting him fuck me”. Later on Saturday she returns home, kisses me (slightly funny taste) and has a bath (strange just before lunch).

Now back to Sunday night, I can understand why I’m not allowed to touch or suck her nipple (it must still be sore) and I’m not allowed her cunt because it’s been stretched and is also still a little sore.

Hence, she’s got me wanking my cock for her to watch, knowing that she’s had a good fuck the day before. She can now watch her husband jerk his cock.

So back to reality, she then pushes up her cotton t-shirt and move over the top of me, so each time I wank her tits bank against my cock, all the time rubbing her panty covered cunt up and down my leg.

“I’m going to cum” I say, she moans and looks down. (I though she was going to take in her mouth, but no). She then watches as I ejaculate all over her tits, my belly and chest. She rolls back over and puts her hand in the mess on my chest and belly, then starts to rub it.

“Did you need that?” she says then puts my hand on her panty covered cunt and says “bring me off now”.

‘Do you want be to tidy this mess (the cum) up?”

“No, I want to touch it and smell your spunk while you wank my clit.”

So I wanked her clit through her panties, then after a while, she took my hand and put it under her panties and made me wank her clit hard (using my middle finger with her hand like I was a sex toy) all this time rubbing the cum on my chest with her other hand. Then she orgasmed.

“I wish you cock ws hard now, I really want it inside me.”

“If you wait and play with it, I’m sure I can get hard again” (I do sometimes within 1/2 hour of ejaculating).

“No I need it now, just after the orgasm. We’ve done this the wrong way around.”

“Have I left you needing more”

“Yes, but not external, internal, I need filling with cock, but this feeling will pass. Next time I’m going to have my fulfillment first and then I may let you have yours”.

YES, this is what I want I thought. Use me for your sexual pleasure in every way and then decide if I’m allowed to ejaculate or NOT.

“OK, I’d like that” I responded.

Vanilla

Nothing in the afternoon (she met someone while food shooping and kept talking, just shows how important sex is to her!).

That night once the kids were in bed asleep, I wanked her clit until she orgasmed twice (she hardly touched my cock throughout), then she pulled me on top of her and pushed my cock up her.

I fucked her for about 5 minutes, then she reached down grabbed by cock and pulled it back a bit. I asked her what was wrong she said “It’s too hard and long and hitting my cervix”. Hey there’s no pleasing some people (it’s always over hard when I’ve had a lay off for a while). She ‘throttled me back’ a little and guided by dick further up and had another orgasm. This was not a particularly comfortable of fulfilling position for me, her hand was really in the way and I couldn’t thrust deep and right up to the hilt (which I really need).

I asked if I could cum now she replied “Yes, cum now, now”. A couple more thrusts (I have quite good ejaculation control) and I ejaculated (first time of a week, god I needed it).

Pretty vanilla by any account, left me feeling pretty unfulfilled (and like I’d been just a clit wanker and dildo) but at least I had some relief (in fact I’d have preferred not to have cum and just been ‘used’ – that at least would not be vanilla). This is NOT my idea of a full and complete sex life and we certainly did not cross any lines in terms of new/deviant sex.

I must admit I like to go to bed with the little whore from my previous post, that’s the women I married, or be used just to pleasure her and not be allowed to ejaculate (thereby prolonging my enjoyment mentally, for a few days).

Very disappointed after a weeks wait, but at least Sarah enjoyed it, she said this morning she’d really enjoyed sex last night and that when I start my new job next week I should come home for lunch every now and then.

To be honest if I’m coming home to vanilla I may rather have lunch at work!

In my book fuck is not just a fuck, physically yes, mentally they are a world apart.

So welcome back to the ‘matrix’ you can start with a vanilla fuck, then next week back to an insurance company with all the other drones. Once you know what’s on the other side it’s hard to go back (or have I just been spoilt and should be grateful for what I have?).

However this morning we had a little frot and chat. I was nice and hard and asked if she’d have sex if the kids weren’t awake. She said “No she’d be too sore after last night, you driving in and out so hard”. While you might think I was disappointed, this was music to my ears. There’s me nice and hard, her cold feel on my balls, her cunt still sore from last night being teased, denied sex, with carnal knowledge of her having a sore cunt (not vanilla, hence much better).

I’ll have a semi-hardon all day, just thinking about that. Vanilla with a slight strawberry twist (IMO).

No sex

Almost a week now since our last fuck fest, I’m getting a little frustrated now and really need a fuck. I’ve decided that I’m not going to initiate sex with Sarah. She’ll have to do all the initation from now on (or at least for a while).

A couple of days ago she said that she thought we’d crossed a line (IE the call me a whore line) and she’s not sure it should have been crossed. Over the last two or three months she’s also been saying that keep asking for sex all the time. I don’t think this is true, but I’m fed up of asking and her giving in and letting me fuck her. I want her to enjoy it (like the last couple of times) not just go through the motions. In fairness once we get started she’s well into it. but I always have the feeling after that I pestered and got my own way.

I’ve been reading bits and bobs on the web about female control of male ejaculation. I dare not bring this subject up with Sarah (having crossed a line and been obsessed with sex according to her) so I’ve decided.
1. Stop pestering her for sex (totally).
2. I won’t initate sex no matter how long I have to go without.
3. I will not wank and ejaculate (I may have a little wank and stoke but will not cum).
4. I will stroke her (she loves that, back, buttocks, neck and hair) whenever she wants. But will not expect sex or any form of sexual pleasure for myself (other than getting pleasure from making her happy).
5. I’ll stop asking her to wear sexy underwear (she seems to associate this with me pestering). If she want to wear it she has plenty in the chest of drawers. If not then I won’t receive pleasure from my wife dressing in sexy underwear.

Finally, I start a new job tomorrow. So no more afternoon sex because I’ll be out all day on the client site. I’m going to find this very hard.

I feel like I’m being drawn back into the ‘matrix’ to be yet another faceless drone, travelling, working, eating a crap lunch, working, travelling, getting home tired, watching crap on TV, (no sex) then sleeping.

At the moment I feel out of the ‘matrix’, able to start and stop work when I want (though I do have to get it done), eat what and when/where I want, fuck when and where I want (assuming Sarah is in agreement) (and as load as I want, hard with kids at home in the morning and night).

To me this is life at its best. But not for much longer. Maybe I’ll get lucky once this work as been completed and be able to work from home again.